Friday, March 18, 2005

Real Men DO NOT

1. Color their hair (gray is fine, go with it. You look distinguished)
2. Get highlights
3. Wax their eyebrows (three words: the Gotti boys. Nuff said)
4. Shave their chest/arms/legs (a little crotch grooming doesn't count)
5. Use self tanners
6. Get manicures or pedicures (Even I don't have the patience to watch nail polish dry)
7. Get plastic surgery
8. Get hair plugs (go bald, it's okay. A real woman will love you for it.)
9. Have a daily moisturizing routine
10. Use more hair products than I do
11. Do yoga or pilates (can't you just get on the damn treadmill and run like the rest of us, for christ's sake?!)
12. Diet
13. Have their initials monogramed on their french cuffs (puhhh-leeeeze)
14. Bake
15. Fear insects/rodents/snakes/dogs
16. Lie about their age (for the love of god, what's that all about?!)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hmmm... 15 out of 16 ain't bad... and if you tasted my chocolate chip cookies, you'd change your mind.