Thursday, August 11, 2005

If the Shoe Fits.....

In response to this on my match.com profile: "I don't like pedicures because I can't stand anyone touching my feet. I don't like manicures because I don't have the patience to sit around and watch nail polish dry"

I get this:

Dear MLIGCS,

I was searching through the on-line personals and came across your profile.

You seem like a very nice person and one who I think I have a lot in common. Of course, I do have a foot fetish and hope this will not be a problem for you. I love everything about feet. I like socks too. If I like a woman, I want to sleep with her socks. And sometimes, put my penis in her socks. I also can only reach an orgasm when I get a "foot job" and find nothing more sexually arousing then bringing a woman to climax with my foot. Some men are turned on by watching "fisting" films, but my library consists of "footing" films.

Have you seen the work of Troy McFoote? He has been in such films as"Footing Angels", "Something is afoot in Savanah's bedroom", "2 Feet from Heaven" and "Footsie and Tootsie go to Washington." (The latter has an anal footing scene that won an AVF award).

I suspect the reason I like feet so much is that I do not have arms. Well, no arms below the elbow. (I thought I should mention that also.) Some women are turned on by stubs, which I often cover with a vibrating steel cover. But, come to think of it, the stubs actually look like little feet, so this too may be problematic. I hope not.

I think in every other way I am the perfect man for you.

I anxiously await your reply.
The Foot Master

I love my friends.....

12 comments:

jay said...

hehehehe

that was hysterical! =) thanks for the chuckles - just what i needed.

you've got a great site here - and obviously, you have some pretty excellent friends.

good luck in the dating game ;)

cheers.

Anne said...

That's just too funny!

intoxik8 said...

Hehehe, thanks for the laugh :)

I'm totally with you on the feet thing !

Hollie The Mom said...

Your friends are a riot but there is medication for that.. LOL

carrotpenis said...

Sounds like a winner. Don't let that one get away.

carrotpenis said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
NewYorkMoments said...

Come on, every little girl dreams of someday shoving her foot up some man's ass.

Saturn said...

OMG. I was sitting here with my mouth open, aghast, until I realized at the bottom that this was a practical joke! Thank God! Hilarious!

Cynikell said...

I think I dated that guy. It didn't work out, though... he hung the toilet paper the wrong way, and that totally weirded me out.

M.Thom said...

OMG, I was totally laughing at work over this. And now I am getting some weird looks...thanks.

Neil said...

Imagine how turned on this "guy" must be during Christmas and all those hanging stockings for Santa.

Kate said...

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Regards, Kate from Top Adult Personals