Appropriate

I was wondering when it became okay to insult a total stranger. Because if there are new rules, I'm game, I just need the handbook.

Last night, at my cousin's engagement party, I wore my fabulous new necklace (chunky oversized beads you see all over SoHo nowadays) to go with my fabulous new dress.

Feeling pretty good after a few cocktails (I love that word by the way - cock and tails, together....but I digress), I was hanging out with my sister and one of her male friends. One of his friends, trying to get in on the action, comes by to get introduced.

Hellos are exchanged. And then suddenly, he points to my necklace and says, "Wow. You look like you're wearing anal beads."

Kaboom. It was like a bomb went off. We stood there dumbfounded for a second, because no one could believe that a complete stranger would have the nerve to talk like that.

Now I'm relatively secure, and pretty confident in my fashion choices, but I couldn't let that slide for some reason.

So I reply, "I appreciate your need to share, but really, shouldn't we get to know each other a little better before you insinuate that you take it up the ass? If you like, after our first date, I could just strap one on and go to town on you."

For some reason, he walked away......